so, internet poker has turned me into depressed, angry dusty today.
38 $16 turbo games today.
10 finishes in the money, for a net profit of... -200 or so.
1 first place.
8 2nd places.
1 3rd place.
Among the highlights are five busts when a worse pocket pair makes trips to beat my better pocket pair, and three 2nd place finishes where I had a 3.5:1 chip lead going into heads-up play. I know I took way too many coinflips and 55/45s for my whole stack, and I lost most of them.
this makes it 3 times in a row that I've tried to move up to the 16s and had my bankroll crushed by loose calls, horrible cards, and too many coinflips brought on by the resulting tiltiness. so it's back to the 6.50s yet again, for an hourly rate only slightly better than minimum wage (unless i'm running hot). shit happens, i suppose.
i really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really want to get drunk or smoke a joint or something, just to get out of my head for a little while. but... if I do that, I'll go to prison. that's a whole other side of depressed, angry dusty that we don't need to get into here.
i am helpless in the face of ill fortune's wrath.
/delete
July 16, 2006
July 13, 2006
f**k yeah
pure energy
Information Society is back.
Producer Paul Robb picked up the rights to the InSoc name from lead singer/producer Kurt Harland, who had since 1997 been mostly being goth and producing video-game music. Robb found Jim Cassidy, another original band member, and added two more people (and a variety of featured artists) to bring back MY FAVORITE GODDAMN BAND EVER.
YEAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!
FUUUUUUUCK YEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
PSA
For the love of all that is good in the world, if you're using Internet Explorer right now.... stop. If you're at a public terminal, and they force you to use IE, show them this post.
Internet Explorer may be the worst piece of software in existence. Its unbreakable attachment to pretty much every program in Windows makes it the perfect vector to unleash all sorts of nasty viruses, hack attacks, trojans, and malware. Windows Update runs on my PC about once a week, and there is nearly always a security update for a vulnerability in Internet Explorer, usually having to do with its unquenchable desire to launch embedded Word/Outlook/Excel/whatever documents. Plus, it's slow.
Using IE is exactly like taking a razor blade, slicing open the end of your penis, and then having unprotected intercourse with every crack whore in New York. If you're not already terminally ill, you will be soon, and it's only a (very short) matter of time. "Oh, dusty, you're just being alarmist. Microsoft would never release software that was so dangerous!!!" No I'm not, and yes they would. They did. You're using it, and you're trying to make excuses why you shouldn't switch. No more excuses.
Click here to download Mozilla Firefox. Firefox is fast, supports tabbed browsing, has an excellent pop-up blocker, and is free. I use Firefox on my PC, but I'm considering switching to Opera.
Click here to download Opera. Opera 9 is brand-new, REALLY fast, and has BitTorrent support built right in. Plus, it masquerades as Internet Explorer if the website you're visiting is tracking the browser you use. (So? So, when we become the United Colonies of Microsoft, you won't be purged.)
You're welcome. That is all.
Information Society is back.
Producer Paul Robb picked up the rights to the InSoc name from lead singer/producer Kurt Harland, who had since 1997 been mostly being goth and producing video-game music. Robb found Jim Cassidy, another original band member, and added two more people (and a variety of featured artists) to bring back MY FAVORITE GODDAMN BAND EVER.
YEAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!
FUUUUUUUCK YEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
PSA
For the love of all that is good in the world, if you're using Internet Explorer right now.... stop. If you're at a public terminal, and they force you to use IE, show them this post.
Internet Explorer may be the worst piece of software in existence. Its unbreakable attachment to pretty much every program in Windows makes it the perfect vector to unleash all sorts of nasty viruses, hack attacks, trojans, and malware. Windows Update runs on my PC about once a week, and there is nearly always a security update for a vulnerability in Internet Explorer, usually having to do with its unquenchable desire to launch embedded Word/Outlook/Excel/whatever documents. Plus, it's slow.
Using IE is exactly like taking a razor blade, slicing open the end of your penis, and then having unprotected intercourse with every crack whore in New York. If you're not already terminally ill, you will be soon, and it's only a (very short) matter of time. "Oh, dusty, you're just being alarmist. Microsoft would never release software that was so dangerous!!!" No I'm not, and yes they would. They did. You're using it, and you're trying to make excuses why you shouldn't switch. No more excuses.
Click here to download Mozilla Firefox. Firefox is fast, supports tabbed browsing, has an excellent pop-up blocker, and is free. I use Firefox on my PC, but I'm considering switching to Opera.
Click here to download Opera. Opera 9 is brand-new, REALLY fast, and has BitTorrent support built right in. Plus, it masquerades as Internet Explorer if the website you're visiting is tracking the browser you use. (So? So, when we become the United Colonies of Microsoft, you won't be purged.)
You're welcome. That is all.
July 12, 2006
f**k
Wow, we finally did it.
The war in Iraq is over (we won); terrorism has been defeated (we even figured out that nasty bit about defeating an ideology). Nobody in America has to go hungry, and everyone has access to a doctor. Our kids get the best public education in the world, and we've figured out a way to let all the immigrants that want to come to the US get visas. Money no longer poisons every part of our government, and elections are fair and free. North Korea and Iran have given up on building nukes, and copyright infringement is a thing of the past. Net neutrality will be preserved, and competition between media companies has been protected.
Phew. Now that we've solved all other problems, we can finally ban gambling on the Internet.
Oh, what? We didn't solve any of those other problems?
Oh. That's too bad. At least we can still ban gambling on the Internet.
fuck you, america.
The war in Iraq is over (we won); terrorism has been defeated (we even figured out that nasty bit about defeating an ideology). Nobody in America has to go hungry, and everyone has access to a doctor. Our kids get the best public education in the world, and we've figured out a way to let all the immigrants that want to come to the US get visas. Money no longer poisons every part of our government, and elections are fair and free. North Korea and Iran have given up on building nukes, and copyright infringement is a thing of the past. Net neutrality will be preserved, and competition between media companies has been protected.
Phew. Now that we've solved all other problems, we can finally ban gambling on the Internet.
Oh, what? We didn't solve any of those other problems?
Oh. That's too bad. At least we can still ban gambling on the Internet.
fuck you, america.
July 11, 2006
fun with things
pwnt in the face
this is hilarious. internet hijacked for benign mischief, news at 11. thanks delicious for the link
i hate to say i told you so
...but I did.
In all seriousness, this doesn't surprise me. People talk about mystical religious experiences in terms of depersonalization, disassociation, flashes of insight, and a general feeling of well-being; research into the effects of psychedelic drugs leads to discussions of "ego death" (depersonalization/disassociation), "euphoria" (well-being), and "you know, like, totally seeing stuff in ways that I'd, you know, never seen before. or something." (flashes of insight) And, of course, there's the well-established use of peyote, datura, ayahuasca, and other natural hallucinogens as religious sacraments by native peoples all up and down the Americas.
Reading all the ONDCP's little pamphlets about magic mushrooms always gives me a chuckle. Unwilling to admit that drugs may not be the worst thing that's ever happened to America, they reach as far as their little hands will let them to find reasons why mushrooms are a Schedule I controlled substance (which makes no sense, as anyone who has eaten the little buggers can tell you): "It is difficult to tell the difference between hallucinogenic mushrooms and other, possibly poisonous mushrooms." "Some users experience severe paranoia, accompanied by increased heart rate and perspiration." Note the conspicuous lack of evidence that mushrooms are an addictive/habit-forming drug, which is usually a precondition for being classified as Schedule I ("high potential for abuse with no discernible medical benefit").
Compare this to some varieties of religious experience: it is difficult to tell the difference between a cult and an honest religion (sometimes); it's difficult to tell whether or not your priest has an... uh... unhealthy interest in your teenage son; often times the threat of eternal damnation or a life of suffering is used to extract cooperation and submission from kids who are too young to decide for themselves whether or not they're being fed a load of crap. (what eight-year-old wouldn't become agitated upon learning that their name had been written in the Book of Death?)
Everyone needs a spiritual experience every now and then; spring cleaning for your mind, as it were. American life is such that we either don't have the time to become skilled enough at Zen meditation to achieve depersonalization, or we're so ADD that we couldn't stop thinking for ten minutes if we had guns to our heads. Some of us are disillusioned with the church we grew up in, or we didn't grow up in a church at all, and thus it feels a little strange to pray to something we don't necessarily feel like we believe in. There's no need for us to walk around, self-absorbed and steeped in our own misery. If there's someone we trust that can procure some psilocybin, or mescaline, or DXM, or MDMA, or what-have-you, and we sincerely want to explore ourselves and the malleable nature of our universe, we can. Just so long as we don't do it alone without experience (sorry, Derek), or irresponsibly, the opportunity for a significant, meaningful experience with long-lasting effects on our state of mind is within reach.
this is hilarious. internet hijacked for benign mischief, news at 11. thanks delicious for the link
i hate to say i told you so
...but I did.
In all seriousness, this doesn't surprise me. People talk about mystical religious experiences in terms of depersonalization, disassociation, flashes of insight, and a general feeling of well-being; research into the effects of psychedelic drugs leads to discussions of "ego death" (depersonalization/disassociation), "euphoria" (well-being), and "you know, like, totally seeing stuff in ways that I'd, you know, never seen before. or something." (flashes of insight) And, of course, there's the well-established use of peyote, datura, ayahuasca, and other natural hallucinogens as religious sacraments by native peoples all up and down the Americas.
Reading all the ONDCP's little pamphlets about magic mushrooms always gives me a chuckle. Unwilling to admit that drugs may not be the worst thing that's ever happened to America, they reach as far as their little hands will let them to find reasons why mushrooms are a Schedule I controlled substance (which makes no sense, as anyone who has eaten the little buggers can tell you): "It is difficult to tell the difference between hallucinogenic mushrooms and other, possibly poisonous mushrooms." "Some users experience severe paranoia, accompanied by increased heart rate and perspiration." Note the conspicuous lack of evidence that mushrooms are an addictive/habit-forming drug, which is usually a precondition for being classified as Schedule I ("high potential for abuse with no discernible medical benefit").
Compare this to some varieties of religious experience: it is difficult to tell the difference between a cult and an honest religion (sometimes); it's difficult to tell whether or not your priest has an... uh... unhealthy interest in your teenage son; often times the threat of eternal damnation or a life of suffering is used to extract cooperation and submission from kids who are too young to decide for themselves whether or not they're being fed a load of crap. (what eight-year-old wouldn't become agitated upon learning that their name had been written in the Book of Death?)
Everyone needs a spiritual experience every now and then; spring cleaning for your mind, as it were. American life is such that we either don't have the time to become skilled enough at Zen meditation to achieve depersonalization, or we're so ADD that we couldn't stop thinking for ten minutes if we had guns to our heads. Some of us are disillusioned with the church we grew up in, or we didn't grow up in a church at all, and thus it feels a little strange to pray to something we don't necessarily feel like we believe in. There's no need for us to walk around, self-absorbed and steeped in our own misery. If there's someone we trust that can procure some psilocybin, or mescaline, or DXM, or MDMA, or what-have-you, and we sincerely want to explore ourselves and the malleable nature of our universe, we can. Just so long as we don't do it alone without experience (sorry, Derek), or irresponsibly, the opportunity for a significant, meaningful experience with long-lasting effects on our state of mind is within reach.
July 10, 2006
mild outrage
Chrissy has a coffee cup that can hold half a pot of coffee; it's like a soup bowl with a handle. While carefully navigating the large rim of said cup, and consuming delicious Original Glazed Krispy Kreme doughnuts, I perused today's Grand Forks Herald. Page 2A was a gigantic green advertisement, paid for by Americans for American Energy. Read it if you like, but you probably already get the gist of their argument. (Republicans for Republican Elections?)
I thought they made the sort of case that would create a lot of initial nods and murmurs of agreements at breakfast tables all over the region, and I simply could not let this giant fluff piece go by uncontested. Arming myself with some useful tidbits of fact (thanks Wikipedia), I composed the following letter to the editor:
ANWR Ad Running Empty on Facts
Page 2A of July 10th's Herald displays a full-page ad, paid for by Americans for American Energy, exhorting us to call our Senators and encourage them to support legislation to drill for oil in the Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge (ANWR). The ad makes an attractive case, speaking of "abundant supplies of American-made energy" that are "locked up on federal lands and in places like ANWR."
This ad speaks loudest when we consider what it does not say. According to estimates by the U.S. Department of the Interior, there are approximately 7.7 billion barrels of oil that drilling can recover. The United States presently uses 20 million barrels of oil every day. If ANWR's oil reserves were used to supply 10% of America's oil needs, we would exhaust the entire supply in less than 10 years. A small fraction of our energy needs that will be consumed in the time it takes for a high-school graduate to become a doctor hardly constitutes an "abundant supply."
In fact, it seems that Americans for American Energy are some of the only people left (besides Republicans in the House and Senate, and the president) who are interested in drilling in ANWR. Oil companies with operations in Alaska, such as BP, Chevron, Texaco, and ConocoPhillips, are all quite familiar with the geology of the region. All of them have stopped lobbying for the right to drill in the reserve.
Drilling in ANWR will not, as the ad suggests, "let America solve its own energy problems." In reality, it lets Republicans solve their own election problems. It will also leave the next generation of leaders no ANWR, no oil left in ANWR, and no real, long-lasting solution to America's addiction to fossil fuels.
-----
We'll see if they print it, and if it raises the hackles of any local wingnuts.
I thought they made the sort of case that would create a lot of initial nods and murmurs of agreements at breakfast tables all over the region, and I simply could not let this giant fluff piece go by uncontested. Arming myself with some useful tidbits of fact (thanks Wikipedia), I composed the following letter to the editor:
ANWR Ad Running Empty on Facts
Page 2A of July 10th's Herald displays a full-page ad, paid for by Americans for American Energy, exhorting us to call our Senators and encourage them to support legislation to drill for oil in the Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge (ANWR). The ad makes an attractive case, speaking of "abundant supplies of American-made energy" that are "locked up on federal lands and in places like ANWR."
This ad speaks loudest when we consider what it does not say. According to estimates by the U.S. Department of the Interior, there are approximately 7.7 billion barrels of oil that drilling can recover. The United States presently uses 20 million barrels of oil every day. If ANWR's oil reserves were used to supply 10% of America's oil needs, we would exhaust the entire supply in less than 10 years. A small fraction of our energy needs that will be consumed in the time it takes for a high-school graduate to become a doctor hardly constitutes an "abundant supply."
In fact, it seems that Americans for American Energy are some of the only people left (besides Republicans in the House and Senate, and the president) who are interested in drilling in ANWR. Oil companies with operations in Alaska, such as BP, Chevron, Texaco, and ConocoPhillips, are all quite familiar with the geology of the region. All of them have stopped lobbying for the right to drill in the reserve.
Drilling in ANWR will not, as the ad suggests, "let America solve its own energy problems." In reality, it lets Republicans solve their own election problems. It will also leave the next generation of leaders no ANWR, no oil left in ANWR, and no real, long-lasting solution to America's addiction to fossil fuels.
-----
We'll see if they print it, and if it raises the hackles of any local wingnuts.
July 9, 2006
wet and/or wild
mini-vacation
The halfway house gives me one night a month where I may gallivant about town (or wherever) without having to come back to sleep. Coincidentally, roommates Travis and Chrissy were going to Chrissy's parents' lake cabin on Tamarac Lake. I, of course, jumped at the chance. We hastily packed up and left on Saturday afternoon, arriving early that evening. The weather was perfect for our chosen endeavors, 90 degrees and calm, with nary a cloud in the sky.
water + skis + dusty = atomic wedgie
I'd never waterskiied before, and Chrissy's dad promised that he'd have me up and going in five minutes. Skiing is incredibly easy, he said; it's the standing-up that's difficult. Really, really difficult. Sheila, one of C's friends, tried six or seven times to get on her feet, but couldn't quite manage it, so I gamely offered myself as the next guinea pig.
Lying on my back in the lake, in a close approximation of the fetal position (except with skis), I signaled our driver to go. The rope went tight, and I was almost immediately struck in the face with an unrelenting wall of water that forced itself into my nose, my eyes, and my ears all at once. I let go of the rope once my skis flew off, over my head. Oops. C's dad (heretoafter referred as Dwight) pulled the boat around, I reattached the skis, and we tried again.
The fourth launch, I made it into almost a sitting position on my skis, but I was not far enough away from the spray to avoid getting a serious water wedgie. I hung on for as long as I could, but with block and tackle tangled in the lining of my shorts, and the constant assault of the spray, I eventually succumbed to the pain and let go, barrel-rolling sideways along the surface of the lake as my skis flew off and my legs pinwheeled in a spectacularly helpless sort of way.
Launch number five was still more successful, but I was once again propelled along the lake when the back tips of my skis crossed and flipped me forward out of them. I would have gone for six, but one of my errant skis clipped me in the back of the head when it landed in the water. I claimed approximate success and gave the rope to Travis, who was also a waterski-virgin. He promptly showed me up by locking out his legs in the fully-upright position on his fifth launch, even skiing one-handed. (jerk.)
tubal ligation
Having established ourselves as relative masters of the waterskiing domain, we moved on to the inner-tubes. I'd never seen inner-tubes like these; they were probably 4 1/2 feet in diameter, and covered completely in nylon mesh, to provide a better surface for jumping wakes. I clung desperately to my tube as Dwight unleashed all 100 of his boat engine's horses, trying not to let my teeth clack together as I flew over the edge of the wake, and then over the front of waves left by jetskiiers, until finally I went airborne without benefit of tube when I was launched off both wake and front-wave combined. Climbing back aboard was a long and draining struggle, and I lasted about 20 seconds on the second run, losing my grip and skipping over the lake surface like a stone when my tube collided with Travis's during a particularly wide turn. (As I came to a stop, I pined for the pre-BTC days, when what little shoulder and back muscle I had was not atrophied away by seven weeks of somnolence.)
Chrissy and Travis proved to be much better tubers than I, with Chrissy attempting the impressive-but-difficult stunt of jumping her tube sideways over Travis's. She completed the trick twice, but was ejected from her tube at the end both times. (From the boat, the wipeouts were just as exciting as the tricks themselves.) Travis's tenacity was unmatched, as he clung to his tube the entire time, cut loose only after an extended period of being dragged upside-down, underwater.
camping out
Weak and tired, we returned to the cabin to build a fire and play Catchphrase with the girls who chose not to accompany us on our water-sport adventures. A recent storm had felled several large trees in the area, one of which was cut up and stacked alongside the house. Some of the wood was really much too thick for satisfactory bonfiring, but Travis was not to be deterred, and threw what must have been the thickest part of the stump (easily 25-30 inches across) into the pit. The seven of us ended up bringing our blankets and pillows outside and sleeping under the stars... at least until dawn, when a thick cloud of mosquitoes descended on us and we retreated into tents and the cabin to sleep a few more hours. Early Sunday morning, Dwight, Travis, and C's friend Natalie went fishing; severely short on sleep, and afraid that I would not be able to ski or tube without more rest, I passed. The trio returned with four northern pike longer than 24 inches, each weighing between 5 and 8 pounds. I would later regret my decision to not fish, as the air remained cool and windy all day (not suitable for being pulled behind a boat). Instead, we just had lunch, I punished Travis, Natalie, and Chrissy in a fast-paced, intense game of croquet, and we headed for home.
Chrissy's parents are equal parts friendly and fun, and they exhorted us to come back again sometime. I can hardly wait.
The halfway house gives me one night a month where I may gallivant about town (or wherever) without having to come back to sleep. Coincidentally, roommates Travis and Chrissy were going to Chrissy's parents' lake cabin on Tamarac Lake. I, of course, jumped at the chance. We hastily packed up and left on Saturday afternoon, arriving early that evening. The weather was perfect for our chosen endeavors, 90 degrees and calm, with nary a cloud in the sky.
water + skis + dusty = atomic wedgie
I'd never waterskiied before, and Chrissy's dad promised that he'd have me up and going in five minutes. Skiing is incredibly easy, he said; it's the standing-up that's difficult. Really, really difficult. Sheila, one of C's friends, tried six or seven times to get on her feet, but couldn't quite manage it, so I gamely offered myself as the next guinea pig.
Lying on my back in the lake, in a close approximation of the fetal position (except with skis), I signaled our driver to go. The rope went tight, and I was almost immediately struck in the face with an unrelenting wall of water that forced itself into my nose, my eyes, and my ears all at once. I let go of the rope once my skis flew off, over my head. Oops. C's dad (heretoafter referred as Dwight) pulled the boat around, I reattached the skis, and we tried again.
The fourth launch, I made it into almost a sitting position on my skis, but I was not far enough away from the spray to avoid getting a serious water wedgie. I hung on for as long as I could, but with block and tackle tangled in the lining of my shorts, and the constant assault of the spray, I eventually succumbed to the pain and let go, barrel-rolling sideways along the surface of the lake as my skis flew off and my legs pinwheeled in a spectacularly helpless sort of way.
Launch number five was still more successful, but I was once again propelled along the lake when the back tips of my skis crossed and flipped me forward out of them. I would have gone for six, but one of my errant skis clipped me in the back of the head when it landed in the water. I claimed approximate success and gave the rope to Travis, who was also a waterski-virgin. He promptly showed me up by locking out his legs in the fully-upright position on his fifth launch, even skiing one-handed. (jerk.)
tubal ligation
Having established ourselves as relative masters of the waterskiing domain, we moved on to the inner-tubes. I'd never seen inner-tubes like these; they were probably 4 1/2 feet in diameter, and covered completely in nylon mesh, to provide a better surface for jumping wakes. I clung desperately to my tube as Dwight unleashed all 100 of his boat engine's horses, trying not to let my teeth clack together as I flew over the edge of the wake, and then over the front of waves left by jetskiiers, until finally I went airborne without benefit of tube when I was launched off both wake and front-wave combined. Climbing back aboard was a long and draining struggle, and I lasted about 20 seconds on the second run, losing my grip and skipping over the lake surface like a stone when my tube collided with Travis's during a particularly wide turn. (As I came to a stop, I pined for the pre-BTC days, when what little shoulder and back muscle I had was not atrophied away by seven weeks of somnolence.)
Chrissy and Travis proved to be much better tubers than I, with Chrissy attempting the impressive-but-difficult stunt of jumping her tube sideways over Travis's. She completed the trick twice, but was ejected from her tube at the end both times. (From the boat, the wipeouts were just as exciting as the tricks themselves.) Travis's tenacity was unmatched, as he clung to his tube the entire time, cut loose only after an extended period of being dragged upside-down, underwater.
camping out
Weak and tired, we returned to the cabin to build a fire and play Catchphrase with the girls who chose not to accompany us on our water-sport adventures. A recent storm had felled several large trees in the area, one of which was cut up and stacked alongside the house. Some of the wood was really much too thick for satisfactory bonfiring, but Travis was not to be deterred, and threw what must have been the thickest part of the stump (easily 25-30 inches across) into the pit. The seven of us ended up bringing our blankets and pillows outside and sleeping under the stars... at least until dawn, when a thick cloud of mosquitoes descended on us and we retreated into tents and the cabin to sleep a few more hours. Early Sunday morning, Dwight, Travis, and C's friend Natalie went fishing; severely short on sleep, and afraid that I would not be able to ski or tube without more rest, I passed. The trio returned with four northern pike longer than 24 inches, each weighing between 5 and 8 pounds. I would later regret my decision to not fish, as the air remained cool and windy all day (not suitable for being pulled behind a boat). Instead, we just had lunch, I punished Travis, Natalie, and Chrissy in a fast-paced, intense game of croquet, and we headed for home.
Chrissy's parents are equal parts friendly and fun, and they exhorted us to come back again sometime. I can hardly wait.
July 7, 2006
elegaic
She said, "kiss me where it smells funny..."
...so I brought her to Grand Forks! HA!
Home is much like I left it. Roommates were expecting me back in a couple of weeks, so it was cool to surprise them. Halfway-house situation is good-to-great; $5 a day and I can come and go as I please, as long as I show up by 11 to go to bed. The motivation to spend all my uncomfortable-bed hours asleep will hopefully return me to some semblance of a regular schedule.
The jerks at the Bismarck Transition Center, where I was so accurately assessed, threw away two nearly-full bottles of cologne that I had in my toiletry bag without telling me. I could not keep them in my room to use; cologne, after all, contains alcohol, which means someone may brave the horrible taste and likely intense nausea and vomiting to drink it. I was told by the guy that counted all my beautiful things upon my arrival that the bottles would remain safe in storage until my release. The administrative-types felt otherwise, tossing out everyone's good smells without so much as a "hey, maybe you should send this back home." So there goes $100. I found the situation neatly descriptive of my time at BTC as a whole.
some delicious factoids
Of the 59 other people I met during my stay at the state hospital in Jamestown last year, 2 of them have since committed suicide. 4 others were at BTC the same time that I was. I did not learn what happened to anyone else, nor did I particularly care to.
There were 43 people on my floor, and 18 places to sit in the TV room.
One of the staff members, who had been there since my arrival, asked me what my name was... the day before I left.
Between the no-booze, lethargy, and missing meals due to sleeping too much, I lost 16 lbs., returning me to my high-school weight of 175.
I received 10 hours of educational group and 3 hours of individual counseling over the course of 49 days (a sore point, obv)
I read five truly great books (Lila, by Robert M. Pirsig; Oryx & Crake, The Blind Assassin, both by Margaret Atwood; Harrington on Hold 'Em Vol. 2, by Dan Harrington et al.; the first half of Infinite Jest, by David Foster Wallace) and countless crappy detective novels.
I went disc-golfing once at the Hillside course in Bismarck and shot a -23 course par (-5 pro). I could have done better.
Upon my return, my steriod-drink-raging roommate Travis (story for later, heh) bought one extra-large Papa Murphy's Chicago-style stuffed pizza, of which we each ate two slices... with regret following immediately.
The first thing I did when I entered my home (aside from, of course, cheerful greetings) was seek out the giant bag of fruit snacks. Its approximate size had not changed since I left... and they're still moist and tasty.
...go ahead. Put them in your mouth. Chew them up.
It's good to be home.
...so I brought her to Grand Forks! HA!
Home is much like I left it. Roommates were expecting me back in a couple of weeks, so it was cool to surprise them. Halfway-house situation is good-to-great; $5 a day and I can come and go as I please, as long as I show up by 11 to go to bed. The motivation to spend all my uncomfortable-bed hours asleep will hopefully return me to some semblance of a regular schedule.
The jerks at the Bismarck Transition Center, where I was so accurately assessed, threw away two nearly-full bottles of cologne that I had in my toiletry bag without telling me. I could not keep them in my room to use; cologne, after all, contains alcohol, which means someone may brave the horrible taste and likely intense nausea and vomiting to drink it. I was told by the guy that counted all my beautiful things upon my arrival that the bottles would remain safe in storage until my release. The administrative-types felt otherwise, tossing out everyone's good smells without so much as a "hey, maybe you should send this back home." So there goes $100. I found the situation neatly descriptive of my time at BTC as a whole.
some delicious factoids
Of the 59 other people I met during my stay at the state hospital in Jamestown last year, 2 of them have since committed suicide. 4 others were at BTC the same time that I was. I did not learn what happened to anyone else, nor did I particularly care to.
There were 43 people on my floor, and 18 places to sit in the TV room.
One of the staff members, who had been there since my arrival, asked me what my name was... the day before I left.
Between the no-booze, lethargy, and missing meals due to sleeping too much, I lost 16 lbs., returning me to my high-school weight of 175.
I received 10 hours of educational group and 3 hours of individual counseling over the course of 49 days (a sore point, obv)
I read five truly great books (Lila, by Robert M. Pirsig; Oryx & Crake, The Blind Assassin, both by Margaret Atwood; Harrington on Hold 'Em Vol. 2, by Dan Harrington et al.; the first half of Infinite Jest, by David Foster Wallace) and countless crappy detective novels.
I went disc-golfing once at the Hillside course in Bismarck and shot a -23 course par (-5 pro). I could have done better.
Upon my return, my steriod-drink-raging roommate Travis (story for later, heh) bought one extra-large Papa Murphy's Chicago-style stuffed pizza, of which we each ate two slices... with regret following immediately.
The first thing I did when I entered my home (aside from, of course, cheerful greetings) was seek out the giant bag of fruit snacks. Its approximate size had not changed since I left... and they're still moist and tasty.
...go ahead. Put them in your mouth. Chew them up.
It's good to be home.
June 29, 2006
untitled 52
i'll rejoin the land of the living on july 7th.
i won't be going "home," as such. it'll be nice to go back to work again, and to have my phone and internet access that doesn't cost .25 for 15 minutes again. i can't even read the best of craigslist or check my myspace invites because of library nannyware. bleh. i'm looking forward to seeing my family; i miss them terribly.
i won't be going "home," as such. it'll be nice to go back to work again, and to have my phone and internet access that doesn't cost .25 for 15 minutes again. i can't even read the best of craigslist or check my myspace invites because of library nannyware. bleh. i'm looking forward to seeing my family; i miss them terribly.
June 20, 2006
update
Q & A
Q: Why won't you answer your phone? Where the fuck are you?
A: I'm in rehab in Bismarck.
Q: Again?
A: Yes, again. This time it was my idea.
Q: Did you violate your probation again? Are you going to prison?
A: No and no. I thought it would be cheaper and easier if I just told my probation officer that I needed to quit drinking, but that turned out to not be the case.
Q: Are you sure you didn't violate your probation?
A: Yes.
Q: You're lying, you liar.
A: That's not a question.
Q: I heard you were in rehab for being gambly.
A: I am quite gambly, yes. That's not the reason, though.
Q: So why ARE you in rehab?
A: About a month ago, after a long night of drinking and screwing around (much like nearly every night for the preceding five months), I woke up sweaty and nauseous, and my hands wouldn't stop shaking. I'd never had a hangover like that before, and when I finally felt like a human being the next day, I realized that I drink way too much way too frequently. I also know that I can't just quit cold turkey... I need a combination of community support and psychological evaluation/treatment.
Q: Are you an alcoholic?
A: Most of the literature says that since you asked me that question, yes, I am. If I say no, then I'm in denial, and if I say yes, then I need to be working a program. Some literature (I am not making this up) says that since you asked me that question, you're most likely an alcoholic too.
Q: Huh?
A: Yes, I am. So are you.
Q: No I'm not.
A: Fine, I don't care.
Q: Why didn't you tell anyone?
A: I went from "hey, I need help" to "you're going to Bismarck for evaluation" in about two days. I had lots of stuff to try and arrange in those two days, and I really didn't think I'd be gone this long.
Q: Why not?
A: I was told that I'd be going to Bismarck to get an evaluation by some of the best counselors in the state, and that it would probably take ten days, plus or minus four. Instead, I've been here for a month, and I got a two-hour evaluation from two girls approximately my age who both graduated from Jamestown College. I wish I'd put up the money for counseling outside of my probation officer's clutches, because now I'm in a system where nobody cares about customer satisfaction... and that sucks.
Q: When are you coming home?
A: July 19th, maybe sooner. I think they want me to stay in a halfway house for a while or something. Not real clear on the details -- you can ask three different people what's up and they'll give you four different answers, none of them concrete.
Q: blah blah blah, all other inquiries
A: Fuck off. I'll be home soon.
love,
dusty
Q: Why won't you answer your phone? Where the fuck are you?
A: I'm in rehab in Bismarck.
Q: Again?
A: Yes, again. This time it was my idea.
Q: Did you violate your probation again? Are you going to prison?
A: No and no. I thought it would be cheaper and easier if I just told my probation officer that I needed to quit drinking, but that turned out to not be the case.
Q: Are you sure you didn't violate your probation?
A: Yes.
Q: You're lying, you liar.
A: That's not a question.
Q: I heard you were in rehab for being gambly.
A: I am quite gambly, yes. That's not the reason, though.
Q: So why ARE you in rehab?
A: About a month ago, after a long night of drinking and screwing around (much like nearly every night for the preceding five months), I woke up sweaty and nauseous, and my hands wouldn't stop shaking. I'd never had a hangover like that before, and when I finally felt like a human being the next day, I realized that I drink way too much way too frequently. I also know that I can't just quit cold turkey... I need a combination of community support and psychological evaluation/treatment.
Q: Are you an alcoholic?
A: Most of the literature says that since you asked me that question, yes, I am. If I say no, then I'm in denial, and if I say yes, then I need to be working a program. Some literature (I am not making this up) says that since you asked me that question, you're most likely an alcoholic too.
Q: Huh?
A: Yes, I am. So are you.
Q: No I'm not.
A: Fine, I don't care.
Q: Why didn't you tell anyone?
A: I went from "hey, I need help" to "you're going to Bismarck for evaluation" in about two days. I had lots of stuff to try and arrange in those two days, and I really didn't think I'd be gone this long.
Q: Why not?
A: I was told that I'd be going to Bismarck to get an evaluation by some of the best counselors in the state, and that it would probably take ten days, plus or minus four. Instead, I've been here for a month, and I got a two-hour evaluation from two girls approximately my age who both graduated from Jamestown College. I wish I'd put up the money for counseling outside of my probation officer's clutches, because now I'm in a system where nobody cares about customer satisfaction... and that sucks.
Q: When are you coming home?
A: July 19th, maybe sooner. I think they want me to stay in a halfway house for a while or something. Not real clear on the details -- you can ask three different people what's up and they'll give you four different answers, none of them concrete.
Q: blah blah blah, all other inquiries
A: Fuck off. I'll be home soon.
love,
dusty
May 19, 2006
April 27, 2006
i call bs
PokerStars Game #4763780697: Tournament #23821248, $6.00+$0.50 Hold'em No Limit - Level IV (50/100) - 2006/04/27 - 21:03:49 (ET)
Table '23821248 1' 9-max Seat #3 is the button
Seat 1: blackeleven (1170 in chips)
Seat 2: pepperlehr (2040 in chips)
Seat 3: hakatak (2340 in chips)
Seat 4: bettingman00 (1315 in chips)
Seat 5: beans09 wsp (1045 in chips)
Seat 6: Guinnessd (2690 in chips)
Seat 8: FASTed101 (1640 in chips)
Seat 9: canucmyhand (1260 in chips)
bettingman00: posts small blind 50
beans09 wsp: posts big blind 100
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to hakatak [Ac Ah]
Guinnessd: folds
FASTed101: calls 100
canucmyhand: folds
blackeleven: folds
pepperlehr: calls 100
hakatak: raises 200 to 300
bettingman00: folds
beans09 wsp: calls 200
FASTed101: calls 200
pepperlehr: folds
*** FLOP *** [Js Jd Ad]
beans09 wsp: checks
FASTed101: checks
hakatak: checks
*** TURN *** [Js Jd Ad] [6s]
beans09 wsp: checks
FASTed101: bets 100
hakatak: calls 100
beans09 wsp: calls 100
*** RIVER *** [Js Jd Ad 6s] [6d]
beans09 wsp: checks
FASTed101: bets 700
hakatak: raises 700 to 1400
beans09 wsp: folds
FASTed101: calls 540 and is all-in
*** SHOW DOWN ***
hakatak: shows [Ac Ah] (a full house, Aces full of Jacks)
FASTed101: shows [6c 6h] (four of a kind, Sixes)
FASTed101 collected 3830 from pot
hakatak said, "omfg"
hakatak said, "nh"
I never WIN hands that way.
and then the rest of the table berated me for slowplaying. as though I should be trying to prevent 45:1 underdogs from sucking out on me.
Table '23821248 1' 9-max Seat #3 is the button
Seat 1: blackeleven (1170 in chips)
Seat 2: pepperlehr (2040 in chips)
Seat 3: hakatak (2340 in chips)
Seat 4: bettingman00 (1315 in chips)
Seat 5: beans09 wsp (1045 in chips)
Seat 6: Guinnessd (2690 in chips)
Seat 8: FASTed101 (1640 in chips)
Seat 9: canucmyhand (1260 in chips)
bettingman00: posts small blind 50
beans09 wsp: posts big blind 100
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to hakatak [Ac Ah]
Guinnessd: folds
FASTed101: calls 100
canucmyhand: folds
blackeleven: folds
pepperlehr: calls 100
hakatak: raises 200 to 300
bettingman00: folds
beans09 wsp: calls 200
FASTed101: calls 200
pepperlehr: folds
*** FLOP *** [Js Jd Ad]
beans09 wsp: checks
FASTed101: checks
hakatak: checks
*** TURN *** [Js Jd Ad] [6s]
beans09 wsp: checks
FASTed101: bets 100
hakatak: calls 100
beans09 wsp: calls 100
*** RIVER *** [Js Jd Ad 6s] [6d]
beans09 wsp: checks
FASTed101: bets 700
hakatak: raises 700 to 1400
beans09 wsp: folds
FASTed101: calls 540 and is all-in
*** SHOW DOWN ***
hakatak: shows [Ac Ah] (a full house, Aces full of Jacks)
FASTed101: shows [6c 6h] (four of a kind, Sixes)
FASTed101 collected 3830 from pot
hakatak said, "omfg"
hakatak said, "nh"
I never WIN hands that way.
and then the rest of the table berated me for slowplaying. as though I should be trying to prevent 45:1 underdogs from sucking out on me.
April 22, 2006
i just wanna break you down so badly
in the worst way
I just downloaded the new Taking Back Sunday album.
it doesn't come out until Tuesday.
I pwn.
I just downloaded the new Taking Back Sunday album.
it doesn't come out until Tuesday.
I pwn.
April 20, 2006
April 17, 2006
it's fun to dream
adanthar, fellow 2+2er and poker savant, won the pokerstars $1,000,000 guaranteed.
dusty placed 12th in a $22 180-man SNG, the highlight of which were 30 starstruck minutes playing against Indyguy28.
americans got sick of the president and his criminal cronies lying, killing their families and friends, and stealing their money.
and graduating from college was no longer the only magical ticket to being successful in american life.
it was a good day.
and tomorrow will be better.
dusty placed 12th in a $22 180-man SNG, the highlight of which were 30 starstruck minutes playing against Indyguy28.
americans got sick of the president and his criminal cronies lying, killing their families and friends, and stealing their money.
and graduating from college was no longer the only magical ticket to being successful in american life.
it was a good day.
and tomorrow will be better.
April 16, 2006
omgwtfpwnd
happy easter
thanks, Paul, for the link. lol!
second hand reports are always unreliable
So all sorts of people from about town have been offering different opinions on the state of the disc golf course at Lincoln Park; yesterday, Derek and I went to check it out. So far, the front nine holes remain completely underwater, and the water is so high that I had to carefully drive off to the right on #10 so my disc didn't go in the river. The back nine holes were in various states of spongy and muddy; 10 was mostly dry, 17 and 18 were somewhat dry, and the rest had a layer of slippery mud coating them. 14 (the long one) had standing water in the middle of the fairway, and 16 was incredibly slick around the pin, so we skipped those two. The course will not really be playable for another week yet.
sign-adjusting hilarity
Seen on the AmericInn sign at 17th Ave. and Columbia Rd., at about 4 am:
THERE THERE
I SPANK LIL
WANT TO BE
A WHORE
omgwtflolbbq.
go twins
Minnesota bitch-slaps the Yankees... barely. I will be watching today's game for sure. It's been a great series so far.
thanks, Paul, for the link. lol!
second hand reports are always unreliable
So all sorts of people from about town have been offering different opinions on the state of the disc golf course at Lincoln Park; yesterday, Derek and I went to check it out. So far, the front nine holes remain completely underwater, and the water is so high that I had to carefully drive off to the right on #10 so my disc didn't go in the river. The back nine holes were in various states of spongy and muddy; 10 was mostly dry, 17 and 18 were somewhat dry, and the rest had a layer of slippery mud coating them. 14 (the long one) had standing water in the middle of the fairway, and 16 was incredibly slick around the pin, so we skipped those two. The course will not really be playable for another week yet.
sign-adjusting hilarity
Seen on the AmericInn sign at 17th Ave. and Columbia Rd., at about 4 am:
THERE THERE
I SPANK LIL
WANT TO BE
A WHORE
omgwtflolbbq.
go twins
Minnesota bitch-slaps the Yankees... barely. I will be watching today's game for sure. It's been a great series so far.
April 15, 2006
sunny and 70 degrees
good times
Yesterday was probably the worst day I've ever worked at BWW. We were incredibly busy, and a little short-staffed. To make matters worst of all, I woke up with a bizarre, nagging pain on the left side of my back. It would go from maybe a 2 or 3 on the Wong-Baker scale at rest to a 4 or 5 when I bent my arm, took a deep breath, turned my torso, tried to lift something, or tried to walk... basically, whenever I moved. I couldn't leave work early, because we were too far behind as it was, and nobody wanted to come in to finish my shift, so I had to work the first two-thirds of my heinously-busy day in intense pain, which made me a little cranky. Luckily, it went away by afternoon, and with it the fears that I was coming down with the cancer.
Last night, save for 20 intensely windy and rainy minutes, the weather was absolutely perfect. I chose to take advantage by having a few friends over to grill; the roommates are all home for Easter, so I had the house to myself. It was a veritable festival of testosterone; we shot the air rifle, sparred, built a fire, and ate lots of charred meat. An excellent time was had by all.
Today, BWW was as low-key and relaxing as yesterday was painful and stressful. We had an extra cashier training with us, and she's simultaneously cute, smart, and willing to do whatever nobody else wants to. The day was made all the sweeter by the comfort of the upcoming two days off. I look forward to sleeping out of spite in the morning. The weather was equally nice this evening, as I puttered around the yard picking up beer cans and shooting them off the picnic table. The scope on Travis's air rifle, which I had previously thought was useless, is actually most excellent, and I fancied myself a professional sniper as I lay prone beneath a tree in the backyard, picking off stationary beer cans from 20 feet away.
poker stuff
I meant to go out tonight, but instead ended up playing $10.50 heads-up tournaments on PokerStars. This was my first time playing them as anything other than a distraction, and I got the idea after reading a couple of articles that were linked to from 2+2. I'll post links next time, as there are a couple of things I'd like to discuss in them. My first impression: totally freakin' awesome. I went on a nice little heater, winning 7 in a row before finally running into someone that knew how to play heads-up poker, tilting immediately, and losing before level 3.
I like being able to intimately know my opponent; in a normal sit 'n go, I don't spend much time worrying about each individual player, as I'm usually 4-tabling, and there's no way to tell who will make it to the bubble, where reads really come in handy. In "match play," as it's known, the beginning of the game provides a nice place to feel out your victim and play some cheap, speculative hands (1500 chips, blinds start at 10/20 and go up every 10 minutes). I also like that if you get lucky, and/or if your opponent is really terrible, you can be counting his money after 5 minutes of play (ex. I flopped top two pair during Level 1, and my opponent flopped bottom two... he was, shall we say, a little disappointed).
It's much harder to autopilot; in fact, it's impossible. I tried two-tabling the heads-up games and hated it; there's too much detail, and the hands come too fast. Playing so many hands gives you the opportunity to really fine-tune your game; just tonight in five hours of play, I learned a little bit more about how to effectively change up your style when the game situation changes, or when your opponent starts catching on to your bullshit.
There's another poker blog to add to the list... the best information here is contained in the last post, where we learn as much as we want about ICM, the Independent Chip Model. Long story short, it's a way to figure out how much of the prize pool you have in front of you when you really just have a stack of tournament chips, and it gives you a way to think about how much equity you stand to gain or lose when you make move X. Anyhoo, here it is.
Yesterday was probably the worst day I've ever worked at BWW. We were incredibly busy, and a little short-staffed. To make matters worst of all, I woke up with a bizarre, nagging pain on the left side of my back. It would go from maybe a 2 or 3 on the Wong-Baker scale at rest to a 4 or 5 when I bent my arm, took a deep breath, turned my torso, tried to lift something, or tried to walk... basically, whenever I moved. I couldn't leave work early, because we were too far behind as it was, and nobody wanted to come in to finish my shift, so I had to work the first two-thirds of my heinously-busy day in intense pain, which made me a little cranky. Luckily, it went away by afternoon, and with it the fears that I was coming down with the cancer.
Last night, save for 20 intensely windy and rainy minutes, the weather was absolutely perfect. I chose to take advantage by having a few friends over to grill; the roommates are all home for Easter, so I had the house to myself. It was a veritable festival of testosterone; we shot the air rifle, sparred, built a fire, and ate lots of charred meat. An excellent time was had by all.
Today, BWW was as low-key and relaxing as yesterday was painful and stressful. We had an extra cashier training with us, and she's simultaneously cute, smart, and willing to do whatever nobody else wants to. The day was made all the sweeter by the comfort of the upcoming two days off. I look forward to sleeping out of spite in the morning. The weather was equally nice this evening, as I puttered around the yard picking up beer cans and shooting them off the picnic table. The scope on Travis's air rifle, which I had previously thought was useless, is actually most excellent, and I fancied myself a professional sniper as I lay prone beneath a tree in the backyard, picking off stationary beer cans from 20 feet away.
poker stuff
I meant to go out tonight, but instead ended up playing $10.50 heads-up tournaments on PokerStars. This was my first time playing them as anything other than a distraction, and I got the idea after reading a couple of articles that were linked to from 2+2. I'll post links next time, as there are a couple of things I'd like to discuss in them. My first impression: totally freakin' awesome. I went on a nice little heater, winning 7 in a row before finally running into someone that knew how to play heads-up poker, tilting immediately, and losing before level 3.
I like being able to intimately know my opponent; in a normal sit 'n go, I don't spend much time worrying about each individual player, as I'm usually 4-tabling, and there's no way to tell who will make it to the bubble, where reads really come in handy. In "match play," as it's known, the beginning of the game provides a nice place to feel out your victim and play some cheap, speculative hands (1500 chips, blinds start at 10/20 and go up every 10 minutes). I also like that if you get lucky, and/or if your opponent is really terrible, you can be counting his money after 5 minutes of play (ex. I flopped top two pair during Level 1, and my opponent flopped bottom two... he was, shall we say, a little disappointed).
It's much harder to autopilot; in fact, it's impossible. I tried two-tabling the heads-up games and hated it; there's too much detail, and the hands come too fast. Playing so many hands gives you the opportunity to really fine-tune your game; just tonight in five hours of play, I learned a little bit more about how to effectively change up your style when the game situation changes, or when your opponent starts catching on to your bullshit.
There's another poker blog to add to the list... the best information here is contained in the last post, where we learn as much as we want about ICM, the Independent Chip Model. Long story short, it's a way to figure out how much of the prize pool you have in front of you when you really just have a stack of tournament chips, and it gives you a way to think about how much equity you stand to gain or lose when you make move X. Anyhoo, here it is.
April 12, 2006
perhaps the noid should have avoided me
all in
I played a couple of satellites for the Heartland Poker Tour in TRF over the weekend. (sorry, derek. it would have been -ev for me to bring you along, as they only ran one at a time.) I have never seen a game with worse blind structure.
winner-take-all
1500 chips
blinds start at 25/50
blinds double (not increase, double) every 10 min.
the dealer has one deck, and uses the same three-stage shuffle he uses at the cash game
...so at each level, you play about six hands. it's like a super-crazy-luckbox turbo. I'm accustomed to playing online turbo games, but this was just nuts. I'd taken one guy down with AK when I pushed preflop and he called with JT; the board missed us both. I pushed with QQ a few minutes later, five handed, and knocked out two other players, one with AT and the other with 88. Later, I folded KQ behind the chip leader's push and another player's call, only to see the three cards that would have made my A-high flush fall. I folded a ton of crap hands near the end, leaving me severely short-stacked and simultaneously allowing me to survive to heads-up.... with a 3:1 chip disadvantage. with the blinds at 400/800, I lasted about three hands. bleh.
luckily, I recouped my $50 loss several times over at the cash game over the next two days, with the highlight being a fairly suspicious SB limp with 35 suited that gave me a straight on the turn, and a blank river card that let me extort a capped round from two players who had flopped 3 of a kind. (final pot: somewhere in the neighborhood of $300, probably the biggest I've ever won)
signs of spring
the weather has been remarkably pleasant the last couple of days. unfortunately, the river is still quite high (receding, now; the point bridge remains closed, but the city reopened the sorlie bridge today. it was sorlie needed, as traffic was getting pretty awful on gateway drive. har har har.); as a result, the disc golf course at lincoln park remains underwater. too bad. what's almost worse is the inevitable coat of flood mud that will remain for weeks after the river's eventual return to its banks.
home for easter
everyone at the house is going home for easter. except me, of course; I am home. most people at BWW are going home for easter, too; somehow, i still got the entire weekend off. i'm looking forward to doing .... nothing. heh. that's not true; there's a local poker tournament going off on saturday, with a $120 buy-in, sponsored by the convention and visitors bureau. they're running $15 satellites at a bar the rest of the week, and unless they're equally ridiculous, I plan to qualify for saturday's game by playing a few until I win. wish me luck.
I played a couple of satellites for the Heartland Poker Tour in TRF over the weekend. (sorry, derek. it would have been -ev for me to bring you along, as they only ran one at a time.) I have never seen a game with worse blind structure.
winner-take-all
1500 chips
blinds start at 25/50
blinds double (not increase, double) every 10 min.
the dealer has one deck, and uses the same three-stage shuffle he uses at the cash game
...so at each level, you play about six hands. it's like a super-crazy-luckbox turbo. I'm accustomed to playing online turbo games, but this was just nuts. I'd taken one guy down with AK when I pushed preflop and he called with JT; the board missed us both. I pushed with QQ a few minutes later, five handed, and knocked out two other players, one with AT and the other with 88. Later, I folded KQ behind the chip leader's push and another player's call, only to see the three cards that would have made my A-high flush fall. I folded a ton of crap hands near the end, leaving me severely short-stacked and simultaneously allowing me to survive to heads-up.... with a 3:1 chip disadvantage. with the blinds at 400/800, I lasted about three hands. bleh.
luckily, I recouped my $50 loss several times over at the cash game over the next two days, with the highlight being a fairly suspicious SB limp with 35 suited that gave me a straight on the turn, and a blank river card that let me extort a capped round from two players who had flopped 3 of a kind. (final pot: somewhere in the neighborhood of $300, probably the biggest I've ever won)
signs of spring
the weather has been remarkably pleasant the last couple of days. unfortunately, the river is still quite high (receding, now; the point bridge remains closed, but the city reopened the sorlie bridge today. it was sorlie needed, as traffic was getting pretty awful on gateway drive. har har har.); as a result, the disc golf course at lincoln park remains underwater. too bad. what's almost worse is the inevitable coat of flood mud that will remain for weeks after the river's eventual return to its banks.
home for easter
everyone at the house is going home for easter. except me, of course; I am home. most people at BWW are going home for easter, too; somehow, i still got the entire weekend off. i'm looking forward to doing .... nothing. heh. that's not true; there's a local poker tournament going off on saturday, with a $120 buy-in, sponsored by the convention and visitors bureau. they're running $15 satellites at a bar the rest of the week, and unless they're equally ridiculous, I plan to qualify for saturday's game by playing a few until I win. wish me luck.
April 5, 2006
it sounds gay, but it's really not
i know an awful lot of people.
of all those people, there are hardly any more alike than derek and myself. aside from derek being smarter than me, that is. (an unfamiliar feeling, for certain)
either way, no single person's foray into the "Web 2.0" has merited an introduction from a blog (that nobody reads) like this person's has.
Welcome to the blogosphere, Derek.
of all those people, there are hardly any more alike than derek and myself. aside from derek being smarter than me, that is. (an unfamiliar feeling, for certain)
either way, no single person's foray into the "Web 2.0" has merited an introduction from a blog (that nobody reads) like this person's has.
Welcome to the blogosphere, Derek.
April 3, 2006
eric gerlitz: 1975-1999
to eric, with swcc:
I wish you could have seen the advances they've made in treating cancer in the last seven years. i don't know if it would have helped. Your website has been taken over by squatters that have exploited your most popular search terms. Gerlitz.com now sells 'virus' sneakers. Despite that, though, a Google search for 'eric gerlitz' leads to three pages of your personal war against email virus hoaxes... some in other languages (particularly German....heheheheheh). You clearly had an impact on both the corporate and academic worlds when you posted that simple little page about how it was all a lie. I think you would have wanted it this way, too -- not for people to immediately find out that you had died, or where you were buried... but for everyone to see the truth... for everyone to talk about what you wanted to do to help protect the Internet.
thank you for introducing me to a style of music that was just finding its feet when you got sick. there is one mix in particular that i wanted to play for you. even people that can't dance love it. your advice/gentle prodding made me seek out and groove (in private) to a sound that is still new and dangerous to most of the people that surround me. eminem says that nobody listens to techno, but we both know he's wrong. I wish I could take you for a cruise down some scary dirt road, making it seem like I didn't know how to drive stick, and then almost wreck your car again. (every time i see a blue plymouth hatchback, I check to make sure you're not just super-incognito.) I wanted you to hear taking back sunday. i think it would have really grown on you, like it did on me.
you were 24. I'm 24 now. part of me is glad that you're not here to see the colossal mess my life has become. let's just say that there would be no internet memorial for me. i know you would still be proud of me, though. thanks for everything. + i miss you.
rule #0: we don't always get what we want.
rule #1: kein mehr lügen.
I wish you could have seen the advances they've made in treating cancer in the last seven years. i don't know if it would have helped. Your website has been taken over by squatters that have exploited your most popular search terms. Gerlitz.com now sells 'virus' sneakers. Despite that, though, a Google search for 'eric gerlitz' leads to three pages of your personal war against email virus hoaxes... some in other languages (particularly German....heheheheheh). You clearly had an impact on both the corporate and academic worlds when you posted that simple little page about how it was all a lie. I think you would have wanted it this way, too -- not for people to immediately find out that you had died, or where you were buried... but for everyone to see the truth... for everyone to talk about what you wanted to do to help protect the Internet.
thank you for introducing me to a style of music that was just finding its feet when you got sick. there is one mix in particular that i wanted to play for you. even people that can't dance love it. your advice/gentle prodding made me seek out and groove (in private) to a sound that is still new and dangerous to most of the people that surround me. eminem says that nobody listens to techno, but we both know he's wrong. I wish I could take you for a cruise down some scary dirt road, making it seem like I didn't know how to drive stick, and then almost wreck your car again. (every time i see a blue plymouth hatchback, I check to make sure you're not just super-incognito.) I wanted you to hear taking back sunday. i think it would have really grown on you, like it did on me.
you were 24. I'm 24 now. part of me is glad that you're not here to see the colossal mess my life has become. let's just say that there would be no internet memorial for me. i know you would still be proud of me, though. thanks for everything. + i miss you.
rule #0: we don't always get what we want.
rule #1: kein mehr lügen.
April 2, 2006
04.02
for the last time
my last name is O'Connell.
See this thing, right here?: '
that is an APOSTROPHE. I don't know why my name has one, but it does. Please don't leave it out, because that makes it a big pain in the ass when I'm on the phone with customer service and they can't find any of my information. Please use a computer system that understands apostrophes on its forms, because it is tremendously frustrating for the less-technologically-inclined members of my family when forms on the Web return as invalid because they're not smart enough to understand names with extra punctuation in them. MOST OF ALL....
It is not a semicolon. THIS is a semicolon: ;
It is not a comma. THIS is a comma: ,
It is not a hyphen. THIS is a hyphen: -
It is not a tilde. THIS is a tilde: ~ (if your puny brain can even pronounce the word tilde, you should know what it is, and therefore, that it is definitely not that thing in my name. seriously, wtf @ you?)
Please do not call my apostrophe a semicolon, a comma, or a hyphen. It's a little less insulting when you call it "one of those..." and trail off, leaving me to say the word 'apostrophe.' I realize that it's a naming convention used only by the Irish and the Klingons, and I also realize that I am neither. Unfortunately, I'm just not the kind of person that is going to change my name because you failed grammar in 9th grade and they let you graduate anyway, just to get rid of you. (don't worry, that's how I graduated, too. but I didn't fail grammar.)
For God's sake, people. Come on. I mean.... seriously. Come on.
And to everyone that's ever filled out a form with my name, included the apostrophe, and capitalized the second letter of my last name... THANK YOU. Your attention to detail is greatly appreciated, and you probably deserve more money than you're making. I'd tip you, but I'm poor.
i live to serve
Today at BWW, bringing food to table of 3 middle-aged men:
me: Can I get you guys anything else right now?
them: Some women would be nice.
me: Well, we have plenty, but they're not for sale.
them: Oh. Well, we'll just take some young boys, then.
me: LOL!!!
pwnd in the face
'pwn3d' is the only 1337 phrase i've ever used with any seriousness. I like it. when I say it, particularly among people that don't know me particularly well or are not geeks, I just say 'owned,' but in my head it looks like 'pwn3d.' We may be nearing common acceptance of the word pwn3d... after all, it was in Newsweek this week. No joke. It was a multiple-choice answer to a question on a quiz of how geeky you are. (marvel at my precise use of prepositions!!! 3ngl15h m4j0rz ph33r my g33k gr33k!! PWNT IN T3H F4C3!!!!!) I scored right in the middle of the geek scale, and I would have been an uber-geek if I'd lied and said I once set up a *nix box, or if I'd lied and said I liked Battlestar Galactica. (PWN3D!!!)
flood of 97 redux
"48 feet, eh? heard that one before..." - Paul
Sometime Thursday night, the sump pump in our basement quit doing the one thing it absolutely must do: pump water from the well. Friday morning, we awoke to pools of water in the basement and soaked carpets from wall to wall. So, Friday night, we did what any homeowner would do... bought some cheap beer, tore up the carpet, threw out the waterlogged padding (HEAVY), shop-vacced, put the carpet back down, and strategically placed air movers around the basement to clear the moisture from the carpet. The bedroom carpet is too thick, and had to be placed on our driveway to dry. Oh, and once we did all that, we stayed up until 5am and drank most of the beer.
The smell, of course, brought back memories. Hopefully, the river will remain within its banks. Hopefully, the new fancy-pants dike system will help keep it there. Hopefully I don't get to wield a sledgehammer and power-washer all summer. If I wanted to do that, I'd go to New Orleans.
insert four words here
new taking back sunday album drops on 4/25. hit my myspace page to hear the first single. man, I can hardly wait. I wish they would tour up this way. check it out. they rock.
my last name is O'Connell.
See this thing, right here?: '
that is an APOSTROPHE. I don't know why my name has one, but it does. Please don't leave it out, because that makes it a big pain in the ass when I'm on the phone with customer service and they can't find any of my information. Please use a computer system that understands apostrophes on its forms, because it is tremendously frustrating for the less-technologically-inclined members of my family when forms on the Web return as invalid because they're not smart enough to understand names with extra punctuation in them. MOST OF ALL....
It is not a semicolon. THIS is a semicolon: ;
It is not a comma. THIS is a comma: ,
It is not a hyphen. THIS is a hyphen: -
It is not a tilde. THIS is a tilde: ~ (if your puny brain can even pronounce the word tilde, you should know what it is, and therefore, that it is definitely not that thing in my name. seriously, wtf @ you?)
Please do not call my apostrophe a semicolon, a comma, or a hyphen. It's a little less insulting when you call it "one of those..." and trail off, leaving me to say the word 'apostrophe.' I realize that it's a naming convention used only by the Irish and the Klingons, and I also realize that I am neither. Unfortunately, I'm just not the kind of person that is going to change my name because you failed grammar in 9th grade and they let you graduate anyway, just to get rid of you. (don't worry, that's how I graduated, too. but I didn't fail grammar.)
For God's sake, people. Come on. I mean.... seriously. Come on.
And to everyone that's ever filled out a form with my name, included the apostrophe, and capitalized the second letter of my last name... THANK YOU. Your attention to detail is greatly appreciated, and you probably deserve more money than you're making. I'd tip you, but I'm poor.
i live to serve
Today at BWW, bringing food to table of 3 middle-aged men:
me: Can I get you guys anything else right now?
them: Some women would be nice.
me: Well, we have plenty, but they're not for sale.
them: Oh. Well, we'll just take some young boys, then.
me: LOL!!!
pwnd in the face
'pwn3d' is the only 1337 phrase i've ever used with any seriousness. I like it. when I say it, particularly among people that don't know me particularly well or are not geeks, I just say 'owned,' but in my head it looks like 'pwn3d.' We may be nearing common acceptance of the word pwn3d... after all, it was in Newsweek this week. No joke. It was a multiple-choice answer to a question on a quiz of how geeky you are. (marvel at my precise use of prepositions!!! 3ngl15h m4j0rz ph33r my g33k gr33k!! PWNT IN T3H F4C3!!!!!) I scored right in the middle of the geek scale, and I would have been an uber-geek if I'd lied and said I once set up a *nix box, or if I'd lied and said I liked Battlestar Galactica. (PWN3D!!!)
flood of 97 redux
"48 feet, eh? heard that one before..." - Paul
Sometime Thursday night, the sump pump in our basement quit doing the one thing it absolutely must do: pump water from the well. Friday morning, we awoke to pools of water in the basement and soaked carpets from wall to wall. So, Friday night, we did what any homeowner would do... bought some cheap beer, tore up the carpet, threw out the waterlogged padding (HEAVY), shop-vacced, put the carpet back down, and strategically placed air movers around the basement to clear the moisture from the carpet. The bedroom carpet is too thick, and had to be placed on our driveway to dry. Oh, and once we did all that, we stayed up until 5am and drank most of the beer.
The smell, of course, brought back memories. Hopefully, the river will remain within its banks. Hopefully, the new fancy-pants dike system will help keep it there. Hopefully I don't get to wield a sledgehammer and power-washer all summer. If I wanted to do that, I'd go to New Orleans.
insert four words here
new taking back sunday album drops on 4/25. hit my myspace page to hear the first single. man, I can hardly wait. I wish they would tour up this way. check it out. they rock.
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