04.02

for the last time
my last name is O'Connell.

See this thing, right here?: '

that is an APOSTROPHE. I don't know why my name has one, but it does. Please don't leave it out, because that makes it a big pain in the ass when I'm on the phone with customer service and they can't find any of my information. Please use a computer system that understands apostrophes on its forms, because it is tremendously frustrating for the less-technologically-inclined members of my family when forms on the Web return as invalid because they're not smart enough to understand names with extra punctuation in them. MOST OF ALL....

It is not a semicolon. THIS is a semicolon: ;

It is not a comma. THIS is a comma: ,

It is not a hyphen. THIS is a hyphen: -

It is not a tilde. THIS is a tilde: ~ (if your puny brain can even pronounce the word tilde, you should know what it is, and therefore, that it is definitely not that thing in my name. seriously, wtf @ you?)

Please do not call my apostrophe a semicolon, a comma, or a hyphen. It's a little less insulting when you call it "one of those..." and trail off, leaving me to say the word 'apostrophe.' I realize that it's a naming convention used only by the Irish and the Klingons, and I also realize that I am neither. Unfortunately, I'm just not the kind of person that is going to change my name because you failed grammar in 9th grade and they let you graduate anyway, just to get rid of you. (don't worry, that's how I graduated, too. but I didn't fail grammar.)

For God's sake, people. Come on. I mean.... seriously. Come on.

And to everyone that's ever filled out a form with my name, included the apostrophe, and capitalized the second letter of my last name... THANK YOU. Your attention to detail is greatly appreciated, and you probably deserve more money than you're making. I'd tip you, but I'm poor.

i live to serve
Today at BWW, bringing food to table of 3 middle-aged men:
me: Can I get you guys anything else right now?
them: Some women would be nice.
me: Well, we have plenty, but they're not for sale.
them: Oh. Well, we'll just take some young boys, then.
me: LOL!!!

pwnd in the face
'pwn3d' is the only 1337 phrase i've ever used with any seriousness. I like it. when I say it, particularly among people that don't know me particularly well or are not geeks, I just say 'owned,' but in my head it looks like 'pwn3d.' We may be nearing common acceptance of the word pwn3d... after all, it was in Newsweek this week. No joke. It was a multiple-choice answer to a question on a quiz of how geeky you are. (marvel at my precise use of prepositions!!! 3ngl15h m4j0rz ph33r my g33k gr33k!! PWNT IN T3H F4C3!!!!!) I scored right in the middle of the geek scale, and I would have been an uber-geek if I'd lied and said I once set up a *nix box, or if I'd lied and said I liked Battlestar Galactica. (PWN3D!!!)

flood of 97 redux
"48 feet, eh? heard that one before..." - Paul

Sometime Thursday night, the sump pump in our basement quit doing the one thing it absolutely must do: pump water from the well. Friday morning, we awoke to pools of water in the basement and soaked carpets from wall to wall. So, Friday night, we did what any homeowner would do... bought some cheap beer, tore up the carpet, threw out the waterlogged padding (HEAVY), shop-vacced, put the carpet back down, and strategically placed air movers around the basement to clear the moisture from the carpet. The bedroom carpet is too thick, and had to be placed on our driveway to dry. Oh, and once we did all that, we stayed up until 5am and drank most of the beer.

The smell, of course, brought back memories. Hopefully, the river will remain within its banks. Hopefully, the new fancy-pants dike system will help keep it there. Hopefully I don't get to wield a sledgehammer and power-washer all summer. If I wanted to do that, I'd go to New Orleans.

insert four words here
new taking back sunday album drops on 4/25. hit my myspace page to hear the first single. man, I can hardly wait. I wish they would tour up this way. check it out. they rock.